Life Transformation from a Refugee Camp

I was only 17 years old. The bottle of liquor slipped from my hand, and with tears streaming from my eyes, I looked at the sky one last time. And then, I swallowed 50 tranquilizer pills dissolved in water, and waited for death.

Everything went black, and I lost consciousness.

When I opened my eyes again, I thought I was dead and that everything had ended. But I found myself lying on a hospital bed with an oxygen mask and an IV attached to me.

The nurse standing next to my bed said, “I’m glad you opened your eyes, young man. You know, God loves you very much. Today you were very lucky because your heart stopped working twice this morning, but God didn’t want you to die, so we used a defibrillator to revive you and bring you back to life. Now you’re better, and you managed to open your eyes. Also, thank the street cleaners because they found you early this morning in the trash, beside a dumpster. If they hadn’t brought you to the hospital promptly, you would be dead now.”

Yes, I had become completely hopeless about life, and for two years, I was trying to kill myself. There were many reasons in my life that had led me to despair. Firstly, the devastating breakup of my parents who had separated from each other and left me helpless; and then losing a girl I loved, brought me to this point. There were other reasons, too, why I no longer wanted to live.

After two days, the doctor came to me and said, “Due to excessive alcohol consumption and the large number of pills you took, your liver has failed, and you need to have a liver transplant as soon as possible, otherwise you will soon lose your life at this young age.” My poor mother was very upset to hear this news and cried, desperately trying to find a liver for me. But when I heard this news, I felt relieved and said, “What good news! I had been contemplating suicide until now. This way, I’ll pass away naturally, and the sin of suicide won’t be on my conscience, and soon I’ll find peace in leaving this world.”

I also considered this opportunity to engage in unlawful activities for the remaining time of my life. Knowing I would soon die, I sought revenge on those around me, emptying out the many resentments I had carried since childhood onto people with all my anger and hatred.

Time passed andThen the day came for me I went to go to the hospital for a liver transplant surgery. After undergoing all the necessary tests, the doctor said, “Do you know what happened?” I asked, “Am I dying?” The doctor replied, “No, you’ll live! Miraculously, your liver has healed itself, and you no longer need a liver transplant. However, you must rest and continue taking your medications.”

Feeling upset about the situation, I left the hospital in tears and said to God, “Why don’t You take my life? What do You want from me? Why am I suffering like this? From today forward, I’ll show You who You are dealing with!” That very night, I began acting defiantly towards God. I engaged in violence, theft, deception, extortion, and wickedness. Unfortunately, I turned into a person devoid of morals and conscience. This continued for months. Because of my numerous scams, I was always on the run from one city to another. Some of the victims sought revenge by trying to kill me. I lost all the wealth I had due to my drug addiction and substance abuse. Consequently, I was forced to flee Iran and seek refuge in a European country, where I was accepted into a refugee camp.

I spent difficult nights in the camp without drugs, waiting for death each night, but death never came. I said to God, “Don’t You see what a terrible person I am? So why don’t You take my life? I’m exhausted.”

That same night, a person named Morteza, who was my neighbor in the camp, approached me. Seeing me exhausted and disheartened, he suggested that I come to his home and be his guest. I accepted. After dinner, he asked me, “Would you like to hear the story of my life?” I eagerly replied, “I would love to hear it!” and he began to tell me about his childhood, how he grew up in loneliness, and how God, whom his friend introduced to him, called him to Christ, the Savior. He said that faith in Christ had transformed his life, bringing him peace and lifting the pains of loneliness and rejection from him.

Unintentionally, I said, “Can this Christ change my life too and free me from these evils and pains?” Morteza replied, “Christ has turned even worse people than you around,” and we both laughed. Then he said, “You just need to invite Christ into your heart.” At that moment, I knelt down, bowed my head, and cried out, “Oh
God, help me, I am in great pain.” Morteza said, “Pray with me and surrender your heart to Christ.” So, I prayed with Morteza and surrendered my heart to Christ. As I prayed, with every tear that fell from my eyes, I felt a greater lightness and calmness in my heart, and I began to feel better.

The next morning, I saw that the world had changed for me, and I could smile at everyone and help others. I was amazed at my own behavior, and everyone noticed this change in me. Very soon, permission for my residency in that country was granted, which was also a miracle of Christ.

I knew that Christ was working in my life and was asking me to take bigger steps for Him, to help wounded and suffering people. So, I prayed and said, “Jesus, use me and equip me to help save lost souls; let me have a part in Your work.”

After two days, miraculously, I became acquainted with Shabakeh and became a member of that. Then Shabakeh 7 introduced me to the 7 University for further equipping. How much I was transformed and was equipped in that university!

Today, I am one of the ministers in the evangelism department of Shabakeh 7 and I take pride in the transformation from someone who was once among the ruffians and rogues of the streets, living a life of sin and contemplating suicide every day, to someone who now, with the help of Christ and Shabakeh 7, seeks out the lost, shares the gospel with them, and seeks to save them.

To this day, through preaching and giving testimony, I have been instrumental in the salvation of dozens of individuals. Many of these individuals have also become actively involved in serving Shabakeh 7.

Praise and glory be to the Lord, Jesus Christ!

—Ashkan